Ok. This might be one of the odder things that I write on here, but it's been bothering me-
Sometimes when I'm talking to people, I get overwhelmed by the idea that really, I know nothing about them. Sure, I know some things they like, some things they dislike, maybe even their favorite color or the instrument that they play, perhaps their musical tastes... but who are they? Are my observations of their personalities different than their perceptions of themselves? For that matter, how do they perceive themselves? Who are they - to themselves? What is their mental image?
Sometimes when I'm talking to people and I just want to go "who are you? could you... describe yourself in a few sentences? Tell me about the things that make you who you are?", I restrain myself, because I'm not entirely certain that this is acceptable fodder for conversation (and I worry that casual friendships do not lend themselves to true exposure of 'self'). And then, there's this feeling that I get that I'm not supposed to have to ask - I should be able to figure it out for myself!! Through interactions, I should be able to see people for who they are. But what about when these interactions are limited? When they only happen via IM or in brief, possibly unique situations? What then?
Sigh.
I don't know... but I still want to.
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3 comments:
Lucky for you, there isn't a who-someone-is -- only the sum of how that person thinks and behaves in the sum of the situations he experiences. You don't have to worry about trying to crack your way into the secret core where some friend's true self lies, because there's no such animal.
I know that there isn't a set anything for who someone is, but there are ways that people think of themselves - and how I think of myself may be much different from how you think of me. That's the sort of thing that I'm wondering about.
I find that the way you perceive someone else can be just as revealing about their true personality as that person's explanation of themselves would be.
I don't think that any of us ever entirely comprehend what truly makes us who we are and so what other people see in us is just a much a part of who we are as what we see within ourselves. That's really skewed logic but I can't think of another way to express it.
Of course, it is possible to get the wrong 'impression' of someone, but over any sort of lengthy interaction it is fairly easy to see 'who' someone is. This as much due to our social experience as growing humans as it is to the innate human desire to communicate to others who and what we are whenever possible.
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